After time spent believing 
that the key to communicating
to living 
            amongst the people 
is – I am still not so sure

I didn’t weep for fifteen years
I didn’t spend a night clean
for fifteen of the longest years
and I didn’t have anyone
for twenty-one

But the key is not to live
with the people, it is to live
with myself, first

I have a discomfort 
with who I am; inherently
my concerns lay within
am I talented, am I smart
am I funny – can I drink?

But to like myself enough
to stop being a victim
to stop letting
myself become less
than I can

That is the key – the only
one. To live among the people
is not a case of knowing them
or of suffering for the hell of it

The key to living among them
is knowing myself, and knowing 
what I need. I deserve the coast
I deserve the wind and to be told
by myself and others – 

I am good.


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