I recently picked up all of my old diaries from my mum’s house and they make for an interesting read. I have always loved to write and been better than that at most things, and as a kiddywink I won some awards and stuff. It was cool. My diaries are mostly introverted teenage bullshit scattered with poems, but there is some real gold in there. Some stuff I don’t think I could write now, because I don’t write now. Well I do. It’s hard. I write essays and reviews and the odd blog, but after watching Californication I got down to a little thinking inspired by our Hank Moody.
When I was 11-17 or whatever I actually wrote. Every single day. I went on the computer but not often, and I certainly didn’t use it to write. Now I just write a poem straight onto a screen and I publish it without a single edit. I feel scrutinised before I even hit ‘post’ because I know that there will be 1,000+ eyes on it in a second. When I get away and spend a little time in Brighton or wherever and I actually write, the stuff is good. When I write on paper I have much less of a filter and it is much easier to make notes and edit and feel like I’m actually producing things. This works differently with essays, where I need to type in order to organise my thoughts in any kind of coherent way. It could too be a case of this – when I am away my head is clear. I have no distractions and nothing to worry about and so even if I was writing on a laptop, it would be better. Who knows. I think what I’m saying is that I write badly on the computer and I am going to spend a little time producing some actual words that I can give to you after a little editing and thought.
In other news, I think I am going to separate my blogs when I finish my uni course. I want my film and TV things to be separate in order to put together a kind of film blog/portfolio as I will soon be starting my MA and trying to get some kind of money from writing. I will still feed those film posts through here and update just as frequently with poems and personal stuff over here, but I just think it would be more professional to keep them separate.
Peace out! xo